Hi,
The interesting thing about FOMO is that when you escape it, standing in the distance, it doesn’t feel like you’re missing out on so much. What started as a temporary hiatus from most social media is now feeling like a great decision. I have less distractions and feel like I can focus on what truly matters. The thought grew from casual statements from two people about my lack of boundaries. And the thought stayed, for months, until I agreed that I did lack boundaries. Many of us do. That is what social media is meant to do, amplify everyone’s thoughts until the boundaries between us is erased. And often, I feel like that is too much information to consume. I should at least have greater regulation over what I experience. So I proceeded to delete WhatsApp, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, and every social media I used besides SnapChat. Even there, I further restricted the number of people that can view what I post. It feels great. And my world hasn’t ended, as I thought it would.
Lately, I’ve found myself thinking about a few things. One of those things is something I read in Norman’s The Design of Everyday Things. It’s a book I recommend reading - truly worth its weight in gold. The concept is the Five Whys. It’s a method used to interrogate cause-and-effect relationships. You keep asking why, over and over again, until you reach the root cause. He feels tired. Why? Because he spent all day working. Why? Because he is poor. Why? Because he gambled away is wealth. Why? Because he has a bad gambling addiction. And now, we know that to solve the man’s weariness, we need to solve is gambling addiction. This example is one I conceived on the fly, without much thought, and so it would have to do. Once you understand the Five Whys, perhaps you might see how shallow causes do not truly explain effects. To explain this, I will make reference to a Jordan Peterson interview I once watched. In the interview, he goes ahead to say only a small percentage of gender pay gap is caused by gender. According to research, it’s caused by many different factors, some of them being lack of interest in full dedication to work, pregnancy, agreeableness, among other things. And maybe he is right, and the research is right. However, what if gender was responsible for a good number of the other causes? What if women are less likely to choose demanding careers because the conditions are less than appropriate for them? What if pregnancy affects gender pay gap only because organisations refuse to consider greater health rights in their corporate structures? What if women are more agreeable than men because the consequences for disagreeableness for women is much harsher than for men?
The Five Whys was historically used at Toyota. It is a critical aspect of the problem solving training that Toyota provides. I have also found that it helps me interpret situations better.
Lately, with less social media to distract me, I have been doing more things that matter to me. One of these things is software engineering. The last time I wrote this much code was when I first started learning software engineering. It’s great, fulfilling, and I’m learning a lot. I’ve also been reading a bunch of things. Most of them are either too technical for most people subscribed or I articles I have lost the link to. But two things I read that I think will be great for most audiences interested in what I write.
Drew Houston's Commencement address: https://news.mit.edu/2013/drew-houstons-commencement-address
Escape from Hell World:
The first, Drew Houston’s Commencement address, felt particularly great to read. He says that all you need to find your place in life is a ball, a circle, and 30,000. A ball, much like a tennis ball that a dog obsesses over. The ball refers to what you are passionate about and will chase with all you have. A circle, which is your circle of friends and will likely determine who you become. And 30,000, the number of days the average person lives for. The startling reality that you’ve run through so many days and should probably start using those days better.
Sometimes, I feel bad that I don’t write on my newsletter as often as I would like to. But then, I stopped being a professional writer to write when I want. Which includes not writing when I don’t want to, especially when I’m working on things I would like to write about.
If you feel the desire to speak to me, my personal mail is: harounayomikun@gmail.com. I will not always reply. But I promise, I do try.
I truly hope you are living the best life you can. I hope that you can step back away from the world, look around you, and confirm that the life you have is what you want. And if it isn’t, I wish say the Serenity Prayer for you.